Bicyclists Are Better Than You Are

At least that is the subtext of this article in today's Minneapolis Star Tribune ("A new attitude about biking in Minneapolis?").  The "new attitude"?  Why the question mark?  As it turns out, the new attitude is "smug satisfaction".

But we already new that, so why is this article in today's paper?  It turns out that a local advocacy group ("Bike Walk Twin Cities," a program of Transit for Livable Communities) issued a press release, so the Star Tribune jumped into action to validate their biases.  Actually, it turns out that while the group hadn't even bothered to issue the study yet, the newspaper was happy to provide the free, pre-publicity.

The article follows the standard form.  It begins in the classic style with an unverifiable assertion, "...signaling that a decade-long cultural shift in transportation and urban design..."  Next comes the first dubious statistic from the advocacy group.  Followed by the quote from the expert from one of the coasts.  In this instance it's from a Rutgers professor of "Urban Transportation."  Us little folk in flyover country are not validated unless someone from the East or West Coast pronounces us good.

Once the preliminaries are out of the way, we get down to business:  giving the hoi polloi their marching orders,

"The trend is also producing new attitudes toward commuting and--in case you hadn't noticed--a need to share the roads no matter what the weather."

So, 'in case you hadn't noticed,' your job while operating those primitive, gas guzzling autos is to get out of the way of the important people on two wheels.

Now we follow up with the soothing reassurances:  that all of those millions spent on bike lanes are finally paying off, that soon everyone will be riding a bike (even you can do it), that all of this way made possible by the all-knowing Federal government.

Next comes the conversion story, how one brave Minnesotan (from Ohio) found biking and let go of the car.

Finally, more dubious statistics, a last, unfunny joke and we are done.  You may now resume your unworthy lives.